dedication to the merit

may you be happy, may you be healthy, may you be free.

What are my intentions with this online space?

I want a place to share and create art with the world. My writing mostly resides within the safe pages of the many journals I’ve had throughout the last 10 years, currently tucked away within a small cardboard moving box.

I want to improve my writing. I want to continue writing for me, but be more intentional about sharing it consistently with the world.

I want to share my visual art pieces, mostly made of watercolor, gouache, and collage. I want to build a consistent practice of making and sharing art, and I think building an online (and in-person) community is a great way to develop this practice.

Overall, I want to take my physical creative work more seriously. My job as a Medical Assistant, and perhaps as a doctor one day, is creative due to it’s collaborative, problem-solving nature. My conversations with patients are creative AND formulaic – there’s a beauty in that balance. I want to harness the consistency I’ve utilized within my clinical work and apply that to my personal arts practice.

And it’s the time to share! I have an instagram account for my artwork, but I’ve been off the app (mostly – I check it on my computer sometimes) for the last few months, and I think it’s been really good for my health – reels and other short-form content fuck up my body’s reward and pleasure centers. It’s really nice to absorb more slow forms of content (even a short youtube video feels so much better than reels). However, I’ve found myself missing the other aspects of instagram – seeing what distant friends are up to, connecting with said friends over shared passions, and having a space to… create and share something that is entirely my own.

I want this space to feel safe and honest. I want to do this for ME. I’ve been thinking about my visibility within the last few months, especially since my depart from most social media (I enjoy Substack). It’s a strange phenomenon, balancing my desire to be seen by the world as my authentic self and the reality that I am the most in touch with… me when I am by myself (I think I feel the most authentic alone in the woods, honestly).

So, this should be interesting. I want to utilize this space to connect with others and create cool opportunities for myself – I want a website to show potential art venues/companies my work, and I’ve been waiting to reach out to spaces until I feel “ready” (although I have a huge physical portfolio of my work).

dedication to the merit

In my meditation practice (whether it be Shambhala, Zen, or another type of Buddhism I am practicing), there is a concept I really love. At the end of many sessions, I have dedicated the benefit of my practice to relieving the suffering of all sentient beings.

I dedicate the benefit of this practice, building an online presence/portfolio, to the same – I hope it nourishes peace and joy not just for me, but for the world.

By this merit may all attain omniscience. May it defeat the enemy, wrong-doing. From the stormy waves of birth, old age, sickness, and death, from the ocean of samsara, may I free all beings.